If you cannot figure out what your child should wear to a service, stick to more neutral or solid colors. The biggest thing is making the child comfortable.
Take the time to try and help them understand what will be going on while at the service
Discuss what is acceptable behavior at a service
One thing that may help is they could draw or color a picture for the loved one or the family to help them understand it is appropriate for cards
Have an exit strategy
Allowing your child to talk about their feelings and work through the grieving process can help them understand a lot more about the service and what others are experiencing around them.
We do have a room for you and your child if they need to play or nap.